The Search to Belong and the Grace That Found Her First, with Meizi Ivery

Join me as Meizi Ivery shares an inspiring journey of adoption, identity, and faith. From being adopted at age four from an orphanage in China to growing up in a loving Christian family in the Midwest, Meizi's story is a testament to God's providence and grace. Discover how she navigated the challenges of being an international and interracial adoptee, and how her faith became her own in college. Be encouraged by the reminder that, just like Meizi, we are all chosen and adopted into God's family, and every day is a gift to live for His glory.

Transcript

Israel Caminero: 0:15

Welcome to Living Testimony Stories of Faith and Redemption. I'm your host, Israel Caminero, and I hope everyone that is out there listening is doing well and they're blessed. With me today, I have my friend Meizi Ivery, and she's here to share her testimony. Could you introduce yourself to everyone?

Meizi Ivery: 0:35

Absolutely. First of all, thank you so much, Israel, for having me on your podcast. My name is Meizi Ivery. Recently. My other name is Esther Kershaw. So I am a teacher at Westside Christian Academy. I teach um dialectic humanities and pre-rhetoric. And uh my husband and I live in uh in Parma currently for now. So yeah, I think that's just an overview of the basics right now.

Israel Caminero: 1:05

That's great. And you like she said, she's recently married. How long now?

Meizi Ivery: 1:10

October 23rd, 2022.

Israel Caminero: 1:13

Oh, okay. So that's that's fresh. It's still fresh. Yes. But I'd like to say welcome and thank you for being here and to share your story for everyone that's listening. And before we get started, I'd like to just start us out in prayer. Father God, thank you, Lord, for today. Tomorrow's not promised, Lord. As we know we are here for you, to serve you, Lord. Uh I want to thank you for Mrs. Ivory being here and sharing her testimony for everyone to hear. That it may touch someone, that she's filled with the spirit as she says what she needs to say and lets everything out that she needs to let out, that some of the listeners that are out there can relate to what she's sharing, Lord. So it might change their life that they start following you and seeking you, Lord, for the opportunity that you've given us with this platform to just reach the world with it and just change people through you. Because it's through you that that's possible, Lord. In Jesus' name we pray, amen.

Meizi Ivery: 2:25

Amen.

Israel Caminero: 2:26

Mrs. Ivory, I'll just call you Mrs. Ivory because I don't want to I don't want to butcher your name.

Meizi Ivery: 2:31

No, that that's okay. You can call me Mitsumitze, whatever you want.

Israel Caminero: 2:35

Um, thank you for being here again. I talked to you again, just like my last guest, I talked to you in the hallway and told you about my podcast, and I appreciate you wanting to share your story. From what I gathered, what you shared with me, it's quite unique. I had no idea that your story was your story, but everyone has a story, and I'm glad that you're going to share it with everyone. And if you want to go ahead and get started, yeah, um, as far as your childhood, we'd love to hear it.

Meizi Ivery: 3:07

Absolutely. Well, first I just want to say um I think that the first response that I had was was, oh my goodness, that this would be terrifying to do. I don't want to talk about me and my life, but the then the second thought was like, Well, it's not really about me and the things that I did. It's it's about how God worked in my life through me, and the parts that were me are not the great parts, and the parts that were God were great, was great. So that is what is worth sharing, and that's worth talking about. Because it really is him in in the beginning. I think it's it began before I was adopted with my parents. Like my mom is, I don't like this term, I think it's kind of cheesy, but it's true. My mom's a prayer warrior. Oh my goodness, that woman prays like crazy. And then when she prays, God answers. And so she was praying a ton about not just like, oh, she wants a baby. She was praying, and she felt like God was saying, Oh, your child's over there in China, like you have a child over there. She did go through a miscarriage um in between two of my older siblings. So I have a sister who's two years older than me named Bailey, and then who uh who's her biological child, and same with my brother, who's about six years older than me at Spencer. But anyway, so my mom was praying a lot about that, and then she went, decided to go on that journey of of adoption, and she would be taking a lot of these classes. She had a lot of people praying for her. I always think this kind of funny. She said that she took this class, and they're like, you know, Chinese girls are typically very quiet, just like very shy, and it's gonna be really hard for her to come out of her shells. So we're gonna teach you some techniques to use to like not scare her. She's gonna be really timid. And then when my mom met me, I was like, and then my mom's like, oh yeah, nope, I don't need those skills. Um, but that's kind of getting ahead of myself. But anyway, so it really is my parents and and their their constant prayer. Um, so in China, there's there's the law of having only one kid, right? And so um, and preferably most people would want a son because then the son could take care of them when they're older and can provide for them. And so oftentimes when there's more than one kid, that child will be left on the street. And so it's very common for um marketplaces to just be filled with abandoned babies at the time. And tragically, a lot of those babies would wouldn't make it, people would not pick them up. Luckily, I was I was one who was picked up, and I was picked up by a police officer, and I had uh hip dysplasia at the time, so it was it looked like my hip looked kind of dislocated or whatever. And so he took me to the hospital, and then and I got surgery, and then I went to the orphanage. So this was in a province called Shanghai, I believe, and the city was Xining, and this orphanage in Shenang, it it is the poorest province in China. It was the poorest one. I've of course I didn't realize that at the time. Like there's this playground, and I was like, oh, it's so great, and it was awesome, and there were a lot of other kids in the orphanage too. Um, but when I went back later in life when I was 16 years old, it was it was like a bucket. Right. Like there was like a bucket and like a piece of metal, and that was the playground. Um but anyway, so I was there until I was four years old. I did have what are those called? Foster moms. I think I had like a foster mom at some point named Lydia, which is kind of crazy because my best friend's name is Lydia now. Anyway, so at four years old, I was adopted. My parents, Jeff Crystal, they're from Ohio. They're definitely like strong Christians. And weirdly enough, that a organization that was partnering with my orphanage was an organization called Christian Action. And that's it's kind of crazy because China is not a Christian nation at all. Exactly. Yeah, and so um I was the first adoption from my province. Uh so then I, you know, I was talking to my by my parents. Can I touch base with you one second? Yeah.

Israel Caminero: 7:33

So you were picked up at the marketplace by a police officer. Isn't that what you said?

Meizi Ivery: 7:39

Well, yeah, that's what they told my mom.

Israel Caminero: 7:40

Oh, okay, that's right. You were young, so this is what you're hearing. Uh so you don't know like what the reasoning behind him picking you up was or anything like that.

Meizi Ivery: 7:49

No, I am I'm like I have some assumptions that it is because of the one child rule and I was a girl, and but it it just is not uncommon.

Israel Caminero: 7:58

Okay, gotcha. I just wanted to I you were obviously too young, so I just was wondering like, was there a reason that he picked you out of everyone that was there?

Meizi Ivery: 8:09

Well, it was God's providence. Right. Because again, it's like I can't even say, you know, I deserve life. Like I deserve to be here. Like I didn't do anything to deserve to be here. There was nothing special about me apart from another child who didn't make it. Right. Right? Like I wasn't like, here's all me, everything that I did, or persuasive or whatever else, which honestly I think is is a pretty good illustration of how God is with us, right? Like there's nothing that we do to convince God that he was like, Oh yeah, you know what, you're worth saving. Like he died on the cross for our sins before we even came to to the earth. So I see that definitely as like God's hand.

Israel Caminero: 8:52

Oh, of course. Like now that now that you're saying it, it's definitely God's hand, you know, because here's a guy probably walking through there, and out of all the people, like you said, picks you.

Meizi Ivery: 9:03

Yeah.

Israel Caminero: 9:03

So I guess it was kind of a silly question that I asked, but no, no, that's not a silly question at all.

Meizi Ivery: 9:09

I mean, there's there's a lot of unknowns there. Um and to be honest, I didn't even I've never really thought about it, and I've never like looked back and thought, wait, why, you know, didn't I have my parents and why like I didn't have any of those questions. I think the moment when I was able to kind of like think and develop my own thoughts and and such my parents were my my adopted parents were my parents. That was mom and dad. They're six feet tall, blonde Dutch people. I'm visibly Asian, very short. So it's but I didn't notice those, like I didn't care about those differences. Like that was mom and dad.

Israel Caminero: 9:46

Right. They nurtured you, so that's your parents, you know.

Meizi Ivery: 9:50

But the transition was not easy. I was a really, really difficult child, right? So I would I was so extroverted. Um, so I was very hard to control, but I was also very angry. And I know that's like my mom, she kind of told me she was like, I think a lot of it was, you know, your anger and you but I wasn't treated any differently than my siblings, which was really nice. Um and a lot of people had things to say about that. Some people they thought that, you know, looked at me with like pity or like, oh, don't be so hard, don't discipline her. Like she has such a tragic story, blah blah blah. But my mom was kind of like very intentional to make sure that I didn't feel any different than my other siblings. That's good. Um, no, but I was a terrible child. I was just a lot of screaming, a lot of like just not being easy to manage. Um in kindergarten, first grade, uh like my teachers, they didn't know what to do with me. I like definitely got bullied too, but like I kind of deserved it. I was very obnoxious. Um and so I was homeschooled for um for fourth grade. And uh and then I went to a Christian school after that. My mom found a tiny little Christian school in Willoughby, and um I went there and and I'm very happy that that's the place where I ended up because like I said, my kind of rebellious nature did not just disappear once I stepped into Christian school, but that was the best environment for it.

Israel Caminero: 11:28

Right.

Meizi Ivery: 11:29

That was the safest environment for it.

Israel Caminero: 11:31

Right.

Meizi Ivery: 11:31

Um, and my parents were pretty strict growing up, and they were very consistent, though at the time I didn't realize it. So something that I didn't say was my parents, they decided to name me Esther after Esther in the Bible, but like growing up I didn't feel like Esther, I kind of felt more like Kane, to be honest, because my sister was perfect, she um could do no wrong, she was very quiet, she never got in trouble by her teachers. She was she was great, and I felt a lot of kind of I don't know, just childish, like this is unjust. Why am I always getting in trouble? Right and stuff like that, um, which was an obviously very kind of selfish thing. But anyway, so uh we went to the same school, the same Christian school, and um but it wasn't until about seventh grade that I actually got saved, and that was when we went to uh church camp. They had something called snow camp, my church did. I just remember I felt like God was speaking to me. There was this worship song playing. It was one of those altar call things. But I do remember at that time where I was like, oh wow, like I need God, I need I need him in my life because clearly I'm terrible. And I that I've always like struggled with the whole like shame thing, you know.

Israel Caminero: 12:57

Okay.

Meizi Ivery: 12:58

Um yeah.

Israel Caminero: 13:00

When you say you were like terrible, do you mean like you were just you know hyper and you know, or do you mean like you were disrespectful? Yeah. Like like what would you like to do?

Meizi Ivery: 13:11

Like very disrespectful, very hyper, very like would not learn. So for example, and my mom, I don't think she minds me telling people this. She's a counselor now and she tells people my story a lot. But one of them is she I'd had to write essays.

Israel Caminero: 13:26

Okay.

Meizi Ivery: 13:27

If I like lied or disobeyed growing up, and there was a summer where I wrote an essay every single day. I just wouldn't learn.

Israel Caminero: 13:34

Right.

Meizi Ivery: 13:35

Like my mom would be like, We love you, we just want you to stop lying. And I just kept doing it. Or we want you to like you need to be respectful, you need to be kind. And I just kept going the other direction. I just kept rebelling over and over.

Israel Caminero: 13:49

And so instead of taking ownership for those actions, I developed some, you know, like the victim mindset of why am I always you real literally just said, you know, you didn't feel any different when you were adopted, but do you think that that might have had something to do with it? You know, as far as like my family, but it's not my family in a type of way.

Meizi Ivery: 14:09

Mm-hmm.

Israel Caminero: 14:10

But I'm sure they loved you regardless. But in your own mind, that's what you were thinking.

Meizi Ivery: 14:15

I think yes. I think like now as an adult and someone who's definitely more sanctified than I was back then, I can see that that was that could be connected absolutely. I mean, also the first four years of someone's life is very, is very important, right? That attachment. Just even like think about a baby being with their mom. I didn't have that, and so the vulnerability in love was uncomfortable. So when my mom was trying to show love to me, I would just kind of be mean, and I think subconsciously it was like, let's be mean and let's be spiteful and see if she's gonna leave and she's gonna, you know, go away kind of thing.

Israel Caminero: 14:57

Makes sense.

Meizi Ivery: 14:58

So I think that part of it was that what's so interesting is that that also kind of mirrors my relationship with God at the time where I was like, you know what? It's hard for me to accept God's love. I was like, Yeah, no, bring it on. Give me an angry God, give me a God who wants the motions. I like that. But the God who is loving, and that was always confusing to me because I was like, Why would you love me, God? I'm I'm terrible, I have such a sinful heart, I'm so selfish all the time. Like, why would you still love me and want me? So it took me a long time to realize that I needed to just get the focus off of myself. Like it wasn't about it's not about me.

Israel Caminero: 15:42

Right.

Meizi Ivery: 15:42

You know, and then but I wasn't at that point yet in in in the high school and middle school. I think I was still kind of rebelling. Like I said, I grew up in a Christian household, so I wasn't the parameters were there to where I wasn't rebelling in a way of like drinking or drugs or things like that. It was just more in my heart and my attitude towards authority.

Israel Caminero: 16:07

Right.

Meizi Ivery: 16:07

Um, and then also my attitude toward authority at that point was not even direct, like, no, I don't want to listen to you, mom. It was uh okay to your face, and then behind your back. Um, which again is like I don't don't think I would ever be like, no, God, you're terrible, but I would, you know, acknowledge God and things like that, but then when in certain times, but then mostly live my life for myself.

Israel Caminero: 16:32

Right.

Meizi Ivery: 16:33

Right. And so that's that's something that I had to learn to kind of get over, if that makes sense.

Israel Caminero: 16:41

It does make total sense.

Meizi Ivery: 16:43

Um the next part of my story I think is when I was 16 I went back to China with my family. We went on a trip. We first started out in Beijing, did the touristy things, but then we went back to my orphanage. And there's some kids there, most of the kids there now are special needs, and there are some who were with me and they're still there. Still there. They're still there. Wow. Yeah.

Israel Caminero: 17:05

Did that bother you? Like, did did it pr bring back memories or anything like that?

Meizi Ivery: 17:10

Like, no. I don't think I I wouldn't have let it. Like I was not an emotionally vulnerable person, if that makes sense. Like I I like to I had a lot of friends and all that, but I wasn't getting that deep or or whatever. Um, but in in China, so I was at the orphanage and I brought my guitar and I played some worship songs with them. They didn't speak English at all, but I think I played something very simple. I think I played like Jesus Loves Me on guitar and sang, and then they were kind of trying to mimic the sounds, and there were still some new kids there too that I connected with, and I think that's when I felt that God was calling me to teaching, which didn't make any sense for me because I was like, I'm not qualified, I get set out in the hall for not for keeping my you know, not keeping my mouth shut. There's no way that I can I can do that, but that voice was so clear, and even though I was rebelling and pushing God away, like I never abandoned me. I've always heard his voice, he's he was there. So that was a big turning point. Also, I was uh on Sundays, I was uh leading preschool Sunday school. Okay. The the kids at the middle school and high school at church, they weren't the nicest. Um they would say a lot of uh racial jokes towards me a lot, which I don't it was all ignorance, but I think what it does to someone is it's like, oh wait, yeah, LOL, you're not one of us.

Israel Caminero: 18:43

Yeah.

Meizi Ivery: 18:43

And it's like, oh wait, I thought we were really good friends, you know, I thought you knew me as a person, and then a comment would would fly off like that and it and be, oh, yeah, no, you don't you don't see me the same as your friend Sarah or whatever. And so my parents they said, well, if you don't want to go back there to to youth group to Sunday school that I mean youth group, then you have to serve in Sunday school. And I did that, but all but that was a blessing because I realized, oh wait, this this teaching thing again, right? God's putting that, putting that in my mind. Um, but again, just not because I feel qualified, but because I felt called. And I think that's one of the biggest lessons of my life is that when you obey God's calling in your life, there's going to be blessings, even despite how you feel, right? Despite how inadequate you feel, and what an imposter. I mean, I feel like we all experienced that at some point. I don't think there's anyone. We're like, oh, do you feel really equipped right now? And you're like, not me. That's that's God, man. I don't know.

Israel Caminero: 19:47

Well, it's just like when we f when you first came in here and asked me what made you get started with this, and I told you the same thing. Like, I wasn't doing that, but here I am doing it. You know, I feel at first I felt Like I was disobeying him when I said, No, I'm not doing that. And here I am on my eighth, ninth episode. Yeah. So and he's good. That's all I gotta say about that.

Meizi Ivery: 20:15

God is great. He just requires our obedience, and I think that's what true faith is, without knowing all the answers, without knowing why or how it's gonna turn out. Just say yes. Um, because God has a plan, and if you say no, it doesn't wreck his plan. He's gonna use someone else. Amen. And so um so you gotta say yes. Uh so I said yes to to teaching, but then were you still rebelling at that time? Yeah, absolutely. I think again with the with the bigger things, I I was like, Yeah, God's calling me to do this. Okay, I'm gonna do it, but the day by day I was still wrestling with the sin of just being so self-centered. Yeah. Of what do I want? How are people I think the one biggest lessons was it's not about how you feel or how people make you feel in it's it's not about that, it's about how you can because it's no one cares about that. It's how can you make other people feel loved and accepted despite what you're feeling, right? But it took a while to to learn to learn that for sure. Because I I think like I said, I wasn't really processing the adoption, I wasn't really processing a lot, honestly, a lot about my faith either. Right. So it was like I'm just accepting God, like that's I'm doing it, I'm gonna obey his call, I'm doing it, but there wasn't a lot of deep kind of reflection because I I did spend at that time a lot of it escaping, escaping into writing mainly and escaping into books because I didn't want to process it. No, I didn't want to process it. And that's yeah, no, I don't that's why I didn't really talk about my adoption at all either. Because I'm like, ew, no, I'm not one of those people who go through trauma. No, that's not me. So I wasn't wasn't doing that. But the next um big section or phase of my life that was very impactful in the way that God has brought me to where I am is in college. So I went to a Christian college. It was very different than the conservative Christian school that I grew up in. Okay.

Israel Caminero: 22:25

Right?

Meizi Ivery: 22:26

The conservative Christian school I grew up in pretty similar to WCA in a lot of ways. The Christian college I went to was very, very liberal, very progressive. And I think I had to understand in my mind, can you can you be a Christian who, you know, sees certain issues differently, or is there one way? And everything was so black and white in my mind, and and I definitely went through waves. Freshman year, I was really angry at them, and I'm like, no, you're not, you're not real believers. Sophomore year, I was like, oh, you're right, all gung-ho, and then junior year and senior year, um, figuring out what actually the truth was in those in those areas. Also during that time without my parents there being in a different state with all the freedom. I did I did go down a path that I shouldn't have. I made friends with people who were fun rather than people who were loving the Lord. And so I was making really bad decisions, decisions that were just selfish and that were harming those around me. But I went to church every Sunday by myself. Okay. Which I think is like so I wasn't, I don't know if I would say I was wrestling with God. I think I was more just directly disobeying him, and then every Sunday being like, I'm so sorry for disobeying you. And then on by Friday, I was disobeying him again. And it was like, man, I just felt like ancient Israel in the Bible, right? Just like over and over and over. And I think that you know, when when we were getting taught that story, the Bible teacher would be like, Oh, isn't ancient Israel so ridiculous? Don't you want to shake them and say, haven't you learned? And I'm just like, Oh, bro, that's me. Like, yeah. So in college I was I was doing that, but then I think senior year is really when I distance myself from from those friends and so and stopped making those decisions. And I got a mentor from my church that I would meet with like every couple weeks, and we would just talk. And the main topic of our conversation was the idea of like shame and about how shame can keep you trapped in a cycle of sin. And it's actually not good because I thought, no, shame is good because it reminds me I'm a sinner, so then I will not sin more, which was so counterintuitive because then I would just keep sinning, right? And so she helped me work through that a lot, and I was that year I was reading the Bible way more and praying more than I ever had in my life. And so those weekends, I was alone in my room reading my Bible and praying and studying and and not partying and not doing those things.

Israel Caminero: 25:08

But yeah, was there a reason that happened? Like did did did it just happen out of the blue? I mean, I'm sure God made it happen, but was there a reason that something happened between you and your friends or something where you kind of left the crowd?

Meizi Ivery: 25:22

Yeah, well, I think really it was when we got a we ended up getting a house junior year. And so what attracted me to my roommates was that one of my roommates, she was she was Vietnamese, but she was raised in California. Another one of my roommates, she was white, but she was raised in Singapore. Another of my roommates, she was Jamaican, but she was raised in England, and I was Chinese, and I was raised in Ohio, and and I was like, oh man, finally people who who can understand, like we're all kind of in the in-between, right, right? And because especially freshman and sophomore year, that's when I actually experienced racism. I think earlier on it was just, you know, silly jokes and prejudice, but and it was from other Asians, and they were actively like, we don't like you, we don't want you hanging out with us because you're not Korean.

Israel Caminero: 26:12

Okay.

Meizi Ivery: 26:13

And and and I so desperately wanted to. So it wasn't it was like, well, I I I finally belong somewhere. And so I was tracked to those housemates, but they were the ones partying, they were the ones doing silly things and smoking and bringing strangers and and just seeing how empty they were on the inside and seeing how they they just weren't they didn't have the same values, I suppose. And so then I found myself like if I'm claiming to be a Christian and and then I join them in things, like that's that's hypocrisy. They they have no excuse. Right. You know what I mean? Like they aren't they aren't saying and and I suppose some of them were raised in the church and they just completely left, but they didn't have the you know, an excuse to behave why they did, they didn't have that hope. But I realized I'm like, I gotta I'm this is feeling icky, like this is wrong. And and so then that's when I just kind of stopped and they became housemates and lots of friends. So Okay.

Israel Caminero: 27:15

Yeah, you don't see them these days, do you?

Meizi Ivery: 27:18

No, no, sir.

Israel Caminero: 27:19

Yeah, I was gonna say, because sometimes friends don't change at all. You know, even when you see them years later, they're still the same person. Yes, you know, and it's like, come on, like really? Like you graduated from high school and college, but you can't graduate out of this lifestyle, you know?

Meizi Ivery: 27:39

Yeah, but I guess everyone everyone has their story, but yeah, my closest friends now are the friends that I met in church, and then the two friends I had growing up that I met at my Christian school. And those are the people that I'm surrounding myself with, and they're not perfect, they all have stories too. Um I think that that was part of it is of me learning that the world wasn't just black and white, there wasn't just non-Christians who were heathens, and then Christians who were just shelter judgmental people in my mind, because I was, you know, right that I was had a very limited view of people. But then when I actually stopped being judg judgmental myself of that and going to church and building communities, I started to realize that people are more complicated and that people can share values and also share struggles and can help each other grow towards the Lord. And that's when I learned what true genuine friendship was was at that point when I was going to the church that I currently attend now after college.

Israel Caminero: 28:41

Okay.

Meizi Ivery: 28:42

And that was another part of like feeling God's call was to leave and go back to Ohio. I had no reason to go back to Ohio. Michigan was amazing, they had the best coffee shops, they had all the culture, all my friends were there, my sister was there, her husband was there, and I'm like, well, who would want to go back to Ohio? But I felt like I was like, go back to Ohio, live with your parents again.

Israel Caminero: 29:00

Well, you know, you have the worst football football team too, right? I'm kidding. He has an Ohio State hat. I'm kidding, totally kidding. Yeah. Um okay, that's what I wanted to ask you. When you first started, you know how you said you were in your Bible and you know, on Fridays or weekends and they were still partying. Did any of those friends tried like coming back to you saying like, what's going on with you? You know, why are you acting all weird now? Or no?

Meizi Ivery: 29:32

No. No. I think that see, that that was the that was No, honestly, it was it was the lie of, you know, you do what's good for you, I do what's good for me, and it's all good. It's it's just tolerance. So they weren't like, oh, why are you acting weird? It was the oh that makes you happy, good for you, man. Like, so that's why it was almost even harder to see because there wasn't that anti-Christian line. It was just such a, oh, you know, we're all Christians. Like it doesn't matter what you believe, man. Like, we're all, you know, there's one God, like we're He loves us all, it doesn't matter. So it was it was that kind of gotcha, if that makes sense. It was that kind of belief that I had to to really choose truth. I'm like, no, there isn't one truth. It isn't just how you feel and everyone's nice and accepting, like God is accepting.

Israel Caminero: 30:24

Right.

Meizi Ivery: 30:25

Um, but there, you know, there there's truth and and there's a way that you need to live your life and it needs to match what you claim. But yeah, so then I went back to Ohio and and lived with my parents for a bit and I got I worked at a Christian school for a couple years, which was very rural, very conservative, very white, and um and I think that God was calling me to go to Christian schools rather than teaching at public schools or maybe inner city schools, because uh since I grew up in that environment I noticed some I want to be careful and not say some problems with it, but kind of of just like this with the Christian schools. Yes, okay. Yes, I didn't really connect with a lot of my teachers growing up and and in it in that way the school is different than WCA. So when I was attending Christian schools, I was noticing certain certain issues and problems, not with God or anything, but just we're humans, we make mistakes, or we're not perfect. Of course. And I just felt like as a s as a student, I wasn't feeling seen necessarily. Like I said, I was kind of rebellious. I felt like to some degree I was labeled and and so rather than saying, oh, Christian schools, they just want to train you to be robots or want you to be perfect or blah blah, why don't why don't I go in there and and be the change rather than complaining about it, right? Like or it's not necessarily be the change, but be there for some of the students who who maybe were similar to me, right? Who were very rambunctious, who did have um outwardly a more complicated relationship with the Lord. So why not do that? And I don't think that I even fully comprehended that reason. Like I said, I was just obeying God's call. It's like, okay, he wants me to go to Christian schools, I'm gonna go to Christian schools. It wasn't until a little later that I realized. And so I was at that school and then and then I found WCA. And it's it's been amazing. God has God has really uh shown me through my colleagues, through with my boss, just what it is like to bring your faith into every area of your life. They don't want you to just get in the classroom, throw out Bible verses, and leave. It's a place where you're really challenged to live it out and live it fully and live for God and just just take the spotlight off of yourself. And I think that's another thing is that in my throughout my testimony when I was focusing on myself and my issues, and am I gonna be good enough for these kids or am I gonna am I a good enough example for them because of things that I've done in the past? Maybe I'm not a good example, or maybe I'm not quiet enough, or like blah blah blah, whatever, all of those, those are just those are honestly fears that the devil plants. Those are lies from the enemy to keep you from doing God's work. But in a place like this, it is about Christian community for real. It is it is not about the individual. And so once you take your focus off of yourself and think about how can how can you love other people, how can you use the personality that God gave you, the skills that he gave you to serve, that's that's when you're fulfilling your calling.

Israel Caminero: 34:05

Amen. Let me tell you a little story about West Side Christian Academy. We lived in Cleveland and we didn't want our kids going to Cleveland public school, so my wife and I bought a house in North Olmstead. And then she told me our kids are going to private school. And I was like, hold on, we just moved to North Olmstead. Why would we put them in private school? And I was so against it. I was so against it. Let me tell you this story. I came here and Pam interviewed us. And I was so against it that at the end of the interview, I was kind of quiet. I wasn't really talking, and at the end of the interview, Pam asked me to pray, and I said, No, I'm not praying. I don't pray. That's what I told her. That's how that's how against the school I was because I was like, I don't want them going to private school.

Meizi Ivery: 35:01

Yeah.

Israel Caminero: 35:02

But you know what? We did it, and it's the best thing we did. This school is amazing. This school, I can say nothing but good things about it, and it's a great school for anyone that's listening to it. It's it's in uh Westlake. And it's a great school. It's called West Side Christian Academy. So if you're local, look it up. Thank you for the plug. I just wanted to say that because I still find that funny. Me and my wife still laugh about it sometimes when she's like, You're not a prayer or whatever.

Meizi Ivery: 35:37

But and now you're praying on your podcast every week, other week.

Israel Caminero: 35:41

So I prayed. I just I was I just wanted to rebel at that, like you almost. You know, and I'm not praying, you know. Like maybe if they think I'm a jerk or something, they want my my kids going there, you know. But I don't know what I was thinking, but I just we laugh about it to this day. Yeah. But I just wanted to throw that out there. I don't know why. I just it's funny.

Meizi Ivery: 36:02

No, I'm glad you shared that because I get it. Yeah. It's the it's the fear of like, what if my prayers don't sound good enough for holy enough for or whatever?

Israel Caminero: 36:14

Right.

Meizi Ivery: 36:15

Um, but that's that's what the devil wants to do, just keep you from praying.

Israel Caminero: 36:19

Exactly. Going back to you, you left off, you're at Westside Christian Academy, and how long have you been there now?

Meizi Ivery: 36:27

This is my third year.

Israel Caminero: 36:29

Okay.

Meizi Ivery: 36:30

Uh could I actually say something that I wanted to say earlier? Yeah. At an earlier point. Absolutely.

Israel Caminero: 36:35

Yeah, go ahead.

Meizi Ivery: 36:36

Um, so going back to when I was in college and I was partying and basically throwing my life away, um, there was definitely one particular instance where it was very dangerous. And at that point, I actually thought about my adoption, which I wasn't thinking about in a while. And I was thinking, there's no way that I was chosen, I was picked, you know, from from China, my parents, they went and got me, they raised me, all that, just for me to throw my life away like this. Like that would be that that doesn't make any sense. That's basically just like spitting in God's face. Exactly. You know? And so realizing that that I was picked, and honestly, everyone who professes to be Christian is adopted into God's family, right? And and He gave us life for a reason, for a purpose, not to waste it away on ourselves.

Israel Caminero: 37:39

Right.

Meizi Ivery: 37:39

But that realization, that is I think that was also a huge turning point into no, I'm not doing this anymore. I'm not indulging in that behavior because why would I when I've been given a gift by God? So yeah, sorry, I just wanted to insert that.

Israel Caminero: 37:58

Oh, no problem at all. And you know, it's I mean, you're an orphan, like you told me that, and it was a big surprise to me. You know, like I was like, oh, you know, I didn't know. But no one knows what people go through, right? Yeah. Until people share these things. And you were given that trial, you were given the trial at your school, and obviously when you were the orphan or younger age, I'm sorry, you probably couldn't process or remember that, but then you had to go through another trial to where now you know, like you just said, Hey, God did this for me. Why am I gonna, you know, not do right for him after he took me out of that orphanage, after he took me out of the partying situation, after, you know, I'm not rebelling anymore. So God's like a painter, He's always painting something, and when he's done, it's a work of art.

Meizi Ivery: 38:55

Yep. We can't get in the way and mess it up. Sometimes rubby little human hands.

Israel Caminero: 39:01

Sometimes we don't quite understand it until later on in life. You know? You know, there's times where people go through trials where you're like, why? Or you know, why did this happen? And you don't understand it, but eventually it'll reveal itself why. Okay, so now enough of me talking. Going back to you, is there anything else that you wanted to share?

Meizi Ivery: 39:24

Um, well How are you doing today? Yes. I'm doing great today. I'm doing great today. Um I am very blessed in in the position that that I'm in. Um I have I have a home. I have the most amazing husband in the world. I have family who love and support me. There's again, these are all gifts, nothing that I deserved or had to work for. But in a sense, I like 'cause I see it it's coming from God. So but I'm I'm I'm doing good. I think that right now the lesson that God is continuing to remind me is of just more of him and less of me and just on a daily basis. And that he's telling me, you know, meetsa you could be faithful in the big things, but man, you gotta be faithful in the small things too, every day. And especially the oh man, the book of James is convict. I say it all the time because it's the book that's all about taming the tongue and being careful with what you say and and and so I think that is a big way of like, no, I need to be faithful to God in that, just even words daily. What am I saying? How am I treating people? Um and so so that's a thing that I'm constantly always having to to work towards and be faithful in.

Israel Caminero: 40:43

That's good.

Meizi Ivery: 40:44

I don't know if that answered your question.

Israel Caminero: 40:45

Yes, it did. Um you teach pre-rhetoric, is it?

Meizi Ivery: 40:51

Yes.

Israel Caminero: 40:52

Okay. Can you explain what that is?

Meizi Ivery: 40:55

Okay. So I'm I'm I'm laughing and I'm laughing sheepishly right now. Um, because it is a class which is designed to teach how to communicate and to think effectively and persuasively. Um even though I'm rambling in this podcast. Okay. Um so it's a course specifically focused more on how and how to do that through the process of writing. So that's that's pre-rhetoric. I grew oh, I have a degree in English and secondary education. And so I've always had a passion for writing and for literature.

Israel Caminero: 41:28

Okay. All right. Thank you for that. Because I'd I'd asked my kids to explain it to me, like, what is that? And I still didn't understand what they were saying until now.

Meizi Ivery: 41:39

Well, Lyson is you're good at it because they they love words.

Israel Caminero: 41:42

Yeah. Okay, so I just want to thank you for being here and sharing that story. Is there anything else that you want to say?

Meizi Ivery: 41:50

Well, um I could share my favorite verse.

Israel Caminero: 41:54

Yes, yes. I was just getting there. See, you beat me to it. I was just getting to the favorite verse part. Thank you. You must heard my podcast.

Meizi Ivery: 42:01

If you if you asked me, is there anything else I'd like to say, we'd be here for hours. I would just keep talking.

Israel Caminero: 42:06

I tell everyone an hour is like you can only share so much in an hour. You know what I mean? Mm-hmm. Like a lot of people share, you know, a good a good amount of their story. And I'm sure you have tons tons of other stuff you could say like you just said, but unfortunately, we only have the time frame in an hour.

Meizi Ivery: 42:26

Yes. And I and I asked the listeners, you know, I I really hope that that the message of following God's calling in your life and putting them at the center. I I really hope that shined through and that anything that kind of takes away from that, I hope you forget. Yeah. Um But the verse, going back to the verse, I'm Where's your favorite verse?

Israel Caminero: 42:49

Well, um Out of all the verses you might like.

Meizi Ivery: 42:52

I've been working on um memorizing the book of James.

Israel Caminero: 42:57

Okay.

Meizi Ivery: 42:58

But I'm gonna look at it because I'm I'm live.

Israel Caminero: 43:01

No adjustments out here.

Meizi Ivery: 43:03

And that is uh James 1, verse 2 through 4. Count I always joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for the testing of your faith produces steadfastness, and let steadfastness have its full effect that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing. And so that's my favorite verse because Well, I'm gonna kind of attack it as a literature teacher would, to be honest. So the first verse is when you meet trials of various kinds, right? Count it as joy as joy. So the daily trials, um, the things that may seem so big and insurmountable, but then the actual big trials, the things you didn't expect, the things that are just gonna just really take you to a different season for an indeterminate amount of time, but count those trials as joy. I think that because it's not natural to us, we are not naturally joyful people, we are naturally pessimistic, sad, escapist people. And so the joy aspect is is uh is something that stands out to me, and especially because not to confuse it with happiness or even just being extroverted, right? Like if you're just happy and you're positive, but it's not joy, it's not from God, then it's not it's gonna be fleeting. Like it's it it's it's just gonna burn away. But then the next part says, for you know the testing of your faith produces steadfastness, and that with each trial, it's not about what comes at you, it's about how you respond to it. And so do you respond in anger at God, at those around you, or do you respond with trust in God's sovereignty? Um, and then let steadfastness having its full effect that you're perfect, complete, lacking in nothing. And steadfastness is that ability to turn to God during those various trials on a continual basis. It's something that's consistent, but then it says that you will that you may be perfect lacking in nothing. And I don't think there's a phrase more adequate to describe the human experience than lacking. We're just lacking in so many things. Everyone's lacking in something.

Israel Caminero: 45:15

For sure.

Meizi Ivery: 45:16

Yeah, but it says this verse says that we can lack nothing, right? So we we can we won't feel that feeling of emptiness if it is found in steadfastness in Christ. So think that those group of verses they can be applied to the smallest of situations to the largest of situations. That's kind of a long explanation.

Israel Caminero: 45:37

No, that was perfect. That was very good. That was very good. Thank you for that. Now we're gonna go back to my back to the past section of my podcast. And as you know, I asked this question. Well, I asked two questions for everyone. If Mrs. Ivory from now can go back to the past, what would you tell younger Esther?

Meizi Ivery: 46:03

Yeah, Esther Mates. Um, I would say that the sooner that you can accept God's love, the more you will be able to love other people.

Israel Caminero: 46:14

Amen.

Meizi Ivery: 46:15

And if you're obsessed with being loved, then you will not be focused on loving others.

Israel Caminero: 46:21

That's good.

Meizi Ivery: 46:22

Because people are not obsessed with being like accept uh being loved by God. It's so weird. No one's like, man, I wish I was like, God loves you. It's our problem, right? If we accept it or not. Yeah. Um, and so we'll look at it and s uh look for it in so many terrible places, and I looked for it in so many places from friendships, especially from relationships, if I'm gonna be honest with you. Um, but it wasn't until I accepted God's love that I wasn't so desperate for it and so focused on self and that I can truly love other people. So I would encourage my younger self to to do that. Accept God's love and show love.

Israel Caminero: 47:03

Amen. That's that was great too. Like you said, people look for love in all the wrong places, you know, and there's only one true person that loves you forever from beginning to end, and that's God. Well, Mrs. Ivory, I continue saying Mrs. Ivory, because I don't want to butcher your name, like I said. I appreciate you being here and sharing that story with everyone. And it's just great how God worked in your life from as a child to where you're at now, you know. Even like you said, that police officer just walking in there and just picking you out of all those kids. And it wasn't so much the police officer, it was just God working through him. Yeah. You know?

Meizi Ivery: 47:52

I don't think anyone in my circumstance could be an atheist. How could you?

Israel Caminero: 47:57

Right. Yeah, so again, thank you for that story. It was a unique story, like I said. I've talked to you outside, and when you shared part of it, I was just like, wow, I would have never thought anything like that. I appreciate you being here and sharing that with all my listeners and all my listeners out there. I hope you enjoy it too. And at this point, I would like to ask you if you could pray us out.

Meizi Ivery: 48:24

I don't pray. Yes, of course.

Israel Caminero: 48:29

You're not a prayer.

Meizi Ivery: 48:30

So sorry, I'm not a prayer. Yes, of course. All right. Um Dear Lord, thank you for this day. Um, thank you for each day that you give us. May we remember that it is a gift. Lord, thank you so much for um the gift of testimony. Thank you that uh you are able to bless us with with so many things and that you are working your story through us. Um thank you for Mr. Camero and um just for his humility and his grace. And just please bless this work that he's doing. And Lord, please be with the listeners as well, Lord. Just may they may they hear the gospel, may they be touched by it, and may they turn their hearts towards you. In your name we pray. Amen.

Israel Caminero: 49:22

Amen. Thank you so much for that prayer. To all my listeners out there, thank you for joining me again. Thank you for listening, thank you for just subscribing, thank you for the reviews, thank you for everything. I thank you from the bottom of my heart. If you know someone or if you yourself that's listening out there in different parts of the world want to be on the show and leave a test or say your testimony, you can contact me at living testimonies at hopmail.com. Just shoot me an email and I will get back to you as soon as I can. And I'd love to have you on here to share your testimony because people need to hear it. People need to hear these testimonies. And you can listen to these podcasts on all major outlets as far as Apple, Spotify, and whatever else podcasts are. There's too many tonight. But thank you so much for joining me. Thank you, Mrs. Ivory, one more time for being here. No problem. And I hope everyone that's listening is blessed and has a great night.