Discovering Freedom from Shame and Finding Redemption, with Teresa Whiting

Join me for a powerful conversation with Teresa Whiting, pastor's wife, ministry leader, and national speaker, as she shares her personal journey of finding hope and redemption in the midst of brokenness.

Teresa opens up about her own experiences with childhood sexual abuse and how she discovered healing and freedom from shame through her friendship with women in the Bible.

She also talks about her recently published Bible study, DisGraced, and how its helping women find redemption and restoration.

Teresa's warmth, vulnerability, and biblical insights will inspire and encourage you to find hope in your own broken places. Don't miss this episode!

Links to connect with Teresa Whiting:

Website: teresawhiting.com

Podcast: Find Hope Here

Book: Graced: How God Redeems and Restores the Broken

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Transcript

Israel Caminero: 0:17

Welcome to Living Testimonies. I'm your host, Israel Caminero, and I hope everyone that's listening is blessed and doing well. With me today I have Teresa Whiting. She's a friend of a friend that I met at a wedding. And now she's my friend also. Teresa, could you introduce yourself to everyone, please?

Teresa Whiting: 0:38

Sure. Um, as Israel said, my name is Teresa Whiting. I am a recent empty nester. I have five grown kids, um, two sets of twins, one we adopted from Romania, and then subsequently we got pregnant with a single daughter and then twins again. So we have five kids that are now all kind of on their own. And my husband and I are adjusting to this new empty nest life. We live in Florida. Uh, thankfully, we are now by the water. We're in St. Petersburg. He is a pastor. Uh, he actually just took a new church recently. It's called Fifth Avenue Baptist Church in St. Pete. And um, you know, there's just been a lot of change in our life, but these are these are good good changes for the most part.

Israel Caminero: 1:29

Indeed. So you had a full house and now it's empty.

Teresa Whiting: 1:33

Yeah. Yeah, I'm still getting used to that.

Israel Caminero: 1:36

Okay. Well, she's here to share her story with everyone, and she has an incredible story that I've heard. And now you get to hear that. But before we get started, I'd like to pray. And I'd like to start by saying, Heavenly Father, we ask that you surround Teresa with your loving presence and your peaceful spirit as she prepares to share her testimony on this podcast. Give her the courage and confidence to share her story, and may her words be a blessing to all who hear them. Help her to feel your guidance and direction, and may her testimony bring glory to you and hope to those who are listening. We pray that you would use Teresa's story to touch hearts and heal wounds and to bring people closer to you. May her words be a source of encouragement and inspiration to all who hear them. We also ask that you would protect Teresa from any anxiety or nervousness, and may she feel your calm and peaceful presence as she shares her testimony. And it's in Jesus' name that we pray. Amen. So, Teresa, the platform is all yours. If you could tell your testimony to the listeners when you were in that pit and how God orchestrated to get you out of that pit.

Teresa Whiting: 2:52

Alright. Well, first I just want to thank you, Israel, for just the opportunity to be on your podcast and to share my story. Um, I just appreciate the invitation. I I love what you're doing. I love your passion for just spreading the gospel to people and spreading hope and encouragement to other people. So thanks for thanks for doing it. Thanks for having me on. Um, I love sharing my testimony. So you want me to just jump right in?

Israel Caminero: 3:22

Yeah, thank you for that also. Thank you for being here.

Teresa Whiting: 3:26

Yeah, yeah. So I grew up in a um, I like to say a big fat Italian family, not a big fat Greek family, but um I grew up the youngest of six kids. Um, my parents had five kids in six years, and then I came along seven years later. Uh, our family was Catholic, and I like to say we were super Catholics because we went to the Latin-speaking mass, even though nobody in our house spoke or understood Latin. My parents were very traditional, and they felt like, you know, this is the true mass, and so that's where we went. Um, as I mentioned, yeah, I'm the youngest of six, and my my siblings were a bit older than me. So I spent my childhood watching all of them experiment with things like drugs and sex and alcohol, because even though we were really religious, um, none of us really knew Jesus. We were just very religious people. Um, and so being the good little Catholic that I was, I knew that my siblings were gonna spend a really long time in purgatory. So I came up with a plan for my life that as a kid, I was gonna try to sin as much as possible. And then when I got old, I was gonna become a nun because I was like, that way I can make up for all my sins and hopefully get into heaven.

Israel Caminero: 4:50

Well, that's a good plan. You had you had a good plan.

Teresa Whiting: 4:53

Yeah, yeah. So I I'd say that I had a pretty average childhood. Um typical, you know, suburban home in America. Um, but I when I was in second grade, I came home from school one day and I was in the care of a male teenage relative. And by the end of the afternoon, um, I had my innocence taken and I was terrified. Um, I was threatened, you know, not to tell anybody because we get in a lot of trouble, and I didn't know what to do, so I went over to my neighbor's house because I thought, well, she's a big fifth grader. Surely she'll know what to do. You know, looking back now, I think I I'm dumping this on a little 10-year-old. But um, she didn't really say anything, not surprisingly. But the next week, when I got on the school bus, all of the kids were laughing and pointing and saying things like, you know, you can't sit here, you can't sit here. But they were making really crude jokes, and it was evident that my secret was out.

Israel Caminero: 5:58

Oh, okay.

Teresa Whiting: 5:59

And so I remember really vividly as I walked to the back of that school bus, just making myself a silent promise, like I will never tell anyone again. So that started a six-year pattern in my life of abuse and secrecy and fear and shame and anger. I became really angry. Um, I know you've heard that phrase, hurt people, hurt people. And so I became like a bully. Um, I remember going to a classmate's house and trying to beat her up, and her grandmother was screaming at me that she was gonna call Juvie. And eventually I stopped picking on other kids, but I turned a lot of that anger in toward myself. And over the years, I would just beat myself up with words like, you're not good enough, you know, you're not a good enough student or athlete or friend, you're not thr thin enough, you're not pretty enough, you're not a good enough wife, or daughter, or mom. I mean, all the things. I would just never ever felt like I was enough. And I I'm guessing that um the listeners probably some of them can relate to those kind of thoughts that you know just haunt you of ne never feeling like you're measuring up. Even not even to somebody else's standards, but to my own. Um well, but I started that. Oh, go ahead. Go ahead.

Israel Caminero: 7:23

I was gonna say that uh those weren't your thoughts, those were lies from the enemy that were in your head. And absolutely. I wanted to touch base. You said how old you were when this happened.

Teresa Whiting: 7:36

So I had just started second grade, which I think that means I was six or two.

Israel Caminero: 7:41

Six or seven or six.

Teresa Whiting: 7:42

Six or seven, six or seven, yeah, seven.

Israel Caminero: 7:43

Oh wow, and it lasted for six years. Okay, I just wanted to clear that up. You can continue with your story.

Teresa Whiting: 7:50

Yeah, so so I'm gonna fast forward now, about six years, and now I'm in the middle, you know, in the throes of middle school, which is a really painful time for most people. I mean, middle school is just filled with anxiety and insecurity. And um, because of my abuse, I had actually at a very young age become promiscuous, and I just figured boys use your body, that's what they do. And so um I would use my own body to get attention or just to feel liked or loved by people. Um, but the summer before I went into eighth grade, my parents came to me and they asked me if I wanted to go to camp, and they said it's a Bible camp, and that really didn't mean anything to me because I had never read or necessarily even seen a Bible. Um, and all I was like, well, are there gonna be boys there? Because I was boy crazy and they said yes, and I was like, All right, I'm in. I'll go to camp. So I did, and um, I had a great week. And the very last night we were circled up in our little tee piece, and our counselor handed out these slips of paper, and she said, I just want you to write yes or no on this paper. Have you ever asked Jesus to be your savior? And I wrote no, and I leaned over to my little friend that I had made at camp and I was like, What did you write? And she said, Yes. And I was like, Oh. And so literally last night of camp, I started listening to what the counselor was saying. I mean, I had been there for a whole week, I hadn't heard a single thing in their chapel services, the songs they sang. I mean, they'd been doing all these little Bible things, but remember, I was there for the boys, right? So I hadn't been listening. Um, and our counselor was explaining that we're all sinners. And, you know, I was in my sin as much as possible life phase. I knew, I knew I was a sinner, like no question about that. Um, and she was explaining that Jesus had died on the cross and being Catholic, you know, we had crucifixes all over our house. I knew that Jesus died on the cross, but that was the first time that I made the connection that that the God of the universe sent his own son for me, like that he wanted a relationship with me. And I was this lost, foul-mouthed, promiscuous teenager. But because of Jesus' death and resurrection, like I could be restored to a relationship with God. And I remember that night being wrapped up in my sleeping bag, and I prayed this stammering prayer, like, Jesus, you know, I'm making a mess of my life. I want to give my life over to you. And that is my defining moment. Like, I I love to say that God rescued me on so many levels. Like He just reached down to me in that pit that I was living in, a pit of abuse and shame and secrecy and fear and anger, and he just pulled me out of that. Um, and I love to share Ephesians too, because it says, You were dead in the trespasses and sins in which you once walked, following the course of this world, following the prince of the power of the air, the spirit that is now at work in the sons of disobedience, among whom we all once lived in the passions of our flesh, carrying out the desires of the body and the mind, and were by nature children of wrath like the rest of mankind. But God best part, but God, being rich in mercy because of the great love with which he loved us, even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ. By grace you have been saved, and raised us up with him and seated us with him in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, so that in the coming ages he might show the immeasurable riches of his grace and kindness toward us in Christ Jesus. For by grace you have been saved through faith, and this is not your own doing, it is the gift of God, not as a result of works, so that no one may boast. And I love to think of the fact that like when I came to Jesus, I was spiritually dead, like I was a corpse, I didn't bring anything to the table at all. I was in my sin, I was a child of wrath, like deserving punishment. But God, because of his mercy and love and kindness and grace, made me alive spiritually. Like I feel like I was on a path of self-destruction, and God just completely began to turn my life around.

Israel Caminero: 12:37

Um, this all happened. I'm I'm gonna interrupt for a second. This all happened that last night at camp, like it just radically changed you after that, that night.

Teresa Whiting: 12:48

I would say that was the beginning of a huge lifelong journey. So that moment I came to know Jesus, and I honestly didn't know the implications. Like I didn't realize that giving my life to Jesus was going to change everything. I just knew I needed to be saved, and Jesus wanted to save me, and I was like, okay, I'll I'll be yours. I didn't know what that meant. That kind of took years to figure out, but I will say things started to change. Like it was so crazy because I'd be out with my friends and we'd be doing things that I had always done. I'd say, I don't do that anymore. And I and they they would look at me like, why not? And I was like, I don't know.

Israel Caminero: 13:32

Of course they didn't.

Teresa Whiting: 13:33

I didn't even know. It was the Holy Spirit was like telling me, don't do that anymore. Like, that's that's not okay. And I didn't even know why. Um I did have the courage finally to stand up to my abuser and say, No more, like you're never gonna do this again. And and he didn't. And so, like, those were pretty drastic changes.

Israel Caminero: 13:56

So that was still happening, even like why you went to camp?

Teresa Whiting: 14:00

Well, I mean, it was up until that person wasn't at camp with me, but you know, it was and it wasn't a constant thing, it was just very sporadic all through those six years.

Israel Caminero: 14:10

Gotcha.

Teresa Whiting: 14:11

So um, but when I when I became a Christian, I had like this courage that I hadn't had before. And not that I've always been super brave since then, it was just one thing that I felt like God kind of rescued me from in that in that situation. Um but I'll tell you, Israel, even after I came to faith in Jesus, and then you know, I my parents at that time in their life, also both of my parents came to know Christ personally, and three of my brothers, and subsequently my two sisters, and so it was kind of crazy that God also like rescued the rest of my family. Um, and so then my parents started going to a church where I was um active in the youth group and I got to know other Christians, and I got to be um mentored by a youth pastor and his wife, and it was just like amazing things started happening. You know, I went to um Bible college and I married a pastor and we started serving in ministry. So, really and truly, I feel like my whole life changed direction when I came to Christ. But even in all of that, like that shame still like held on to me. I still felt shame all through my life, like even as an adult. And and it like you said, it was Satan whispering those things like, if only they knew, like you still don't belong, you're still not good enough. And for so many years, I thought I would just live with that shame for the rest of my life. But um, about seven years ago, I started a ministry where speaking, you know, speaking to different churches and different women, and um, I began to tell my story, and not just my story, but I would tell stories of women in scripture. And you know, we each we each come to scripture with our own glass, you know, set of glasses on. And for me, I came with my past and my baggage. And so as I read and studied the Bible, I these women with stories of sexual brokenness would just jump out at me and be like, oh my goodness, look at what happened to Tamar. Wait, Rahab is in the line of Jesus. Oh, you know, look what happened to Bathsheba, look at this one. And it was just crazy because I kept encountering stories of woman after woman who had these terrible things in their lives that were similar to my life. And I got as I got to know these people, I realized something that these were not just these little sideline stories like that God tucked away in some hidden corner, but that they were women that God shined a spotlight on. And he's like, guess what? You know, all these women that that have been raped or abused or married to wicked men or what have you, all the all these different things in the line of Jesus, these these are my people. Like, even if you just look at the family line of Jesus in Matthew 1, you know, it's this genealogy, it's got 42 men named and only five women, and every single one of those women, you could argue, had some sort of sexual brokenness. Tamar, who seduced her father-in-law, Rahab, who was a prostitute, Ruth, who was a descendant of you know the Moabites that came from the incestuous line of Lot and his daughters, Bathsheba, who I would argue was raped by King David. And then Mary, even though Mary was innocent, she was she had a reputation. Like they said, I remember the Pharisees once said to Jesus, like, we're not, you know, children of immorality, like insinuating that Mary was immoral. Um, and so you see these women that God didn't just choose, but he's like, look at this one! Like, don't forget these. I'm gonna call them out. And it just started to make an impact on me that these are the women that Jesus chose to be in his family to build his kingdom. You look at the New Testament and the women that Jesus hung out with, like the ones he sought out and rescued and spent time with, the woman at the well, the woman caught in adultery. You see all these stories of Jesus like going out of his way to love and rescue these women. And and really that is what started to break that power of shame that had really covered my life for so long, realizing like these are the women that Jesus came through and came for, the ones with the messy lives and the sketchy backgrounds, and really there's just so much brokenness all through scripture. And so, um, you know, I just got to realize that if God is not ashamed of these kind of stories, then then I don't need to be ashamed either. And if he can rescue and redeem and restore those women, then he can do that for me and for you, listener, you know, who may have been walking through some kind of brokenness, whether it's sexual or otherwise. I mean, because if it's not that, it's something else. It could be, you know, divorce or abortion or financial mishandling or illness. I mean, it could be anything. We're all living in this broken world. So um, you know, just God's grace just has rocked my world and I feel like has made the difference. And I will not in ever, ever say, like, here I am, I've arrived, I've got this bow tied up. No, no, it's a journey. That I'm still on, that I'm still learning, still growing, still battling shame and those voices, but not where I used to be.

Israel Caminero: 20:09

That's so good. I like how you touch space on all those women from the Bible. And it's so true, you know, that he was looking out for them. Even the one that touched his garment. Remember her? Mm-hmm. Yes, yes. Same thing. Like he she was scared, and she went and touched his garment, and he turned around like who touched? And he didn't yell at her, turn her, turn her down, or anything like that. He said, You're healed, you know? Your faith. Yeah. Your faith. Yes. I like that.

Teresa Whiting: 20:40

And he called her daughter. Yeah. Like this woman was a social outcast, and he turned around, like, took the time and called her daughter. Oh, I get chills when I think of that story.

Israel Caminero: 20:50

That's right. Well, one question I had is that you said, even though you turned to Christ and everything, you still kept feeling shame. Was that because you were holding all that stuff that happened behind the past inside? Like you weren't sharing it with people, you were giving everyone a different perception of yourself?

Teresa Whiting: 21:10

Yeah. I mean, I didn't I didn't share that until I was in my 40s. As a matter of fact, the few times that I tried to share it, I was I was pretty much shut down. Um before I married my husband, I was terrified. I was like, I'm carrying this terrible secret into my marriage. And I went to um a woman at my college, and I said to her, I said, you know, this is this is what happened to me. And she said, I would never give this advice. She said to me, You don't need to tell anybody, and you certainly don't need to tell Greg. And I was like, Oh, really? Like, it was almost like you need to keep that a secret for the rest of your life. And I ended up, I did tell Greg. I couldn't, I couldn't bear with that kind of secret going into marriage. But um, but also there were other times when I had tried to share my story and just felt like uh felt like I was being silenced and kind of like this is not something we're gonna talk about. We don't talk about this kind of stuff. Like we put this behind us, you know, you're a new creature, that person's forgiven, just move on with your life. And and that was not helpful, you know. So it wasn't until I started talking about it and sharing my story that I really felt like I started to heal from it. And you know, letting that out. And I have since talked with counselors, um, I have since, you know, worked through it much, much more extensively, but for so many years, like holding on to that secret was really to me shame-inducing.

Israel Caminero: 22:55

Well, that's good though, you know, because sometimes, like the old saying goes, it's out of sight, out of mind, but this time it was out of sight but still in the mind. And and sometimes you have to release that and talk about it in order to heal yourself, which you did. I mean, it took it took a while, but you took that leap and you released it, and that's why you're doing what you're doing today, which is a good thing. I commend you for uh taking that leap of faith and just letting it out there and you know, 'cause sometimes you're scared too, because people might judge you, right? You they see you as this Christian lady, and then you want you say this, and some people might judge you, but that's the whole part of the testimony is you're not that same person anymore. That's that's your old self. You know, and you can't I mean I can't say that you can't, but a lot of people go through trials before they s you know, before they meet Jesus. Some people don't, and I love that. You know, some people I've had people on here that haven't had any trials, and they still have a testimony though. It's still a testimony because without a trial, without the enemy or anything sitting there attacking you, they still have struggles. I want to thank you for that, Teresa. And yeah, for what you're doing as far as speaking. You can explain to the people what you're doing now.

Teresa Whiting: 24:20

Yeah, so um about seven years ago I started, you know, kind of a ministry with speaking, and then about a year and a half ago, I actually started a podcast because I love to talk about this kind of stuff, and I started with going through some of these women in scripture because um last June, June of 2023, I published a Bible study, and it's actually called Graced. If you look at the cover, it's the word disgraced with the disc crossed out, and it's Graced, how God redeems and restores the broken. And it's it's funny because it's not really the study I wanted to write. I really and truly wanted to write like a pretty safe, generic Bible study, but God clearly um directed me to write this study, which is about six women in scripture that God rescued and redeemed and restored from sexual brokenness. So it's Tamar, Rahab, Bathsheba, the woman at the well, the woman caught in adultery, and the sinful woman at Simon's house. And, you know, I didn't I didn't really want to write that because I didn't want to be known as the sexual brokenness lady. I didn't want to be, you know, the sexual abuse lady. But God eventually convinced me like, can you be the hope lady? Can you be the woman that looks others in the eye and says you're not alone? You know, you do not need to live in shame. And God isn't done with you because of what you've experienced. He has plans for you, you know, beyond what you're what you can even imagine. And so um the really that that trauma in my life has become an avenue for ministry, and that's not the only thing I talk about. So, you know, if somebody's you know looking for a women's speaker, I love to talk about all kinds of things, but that's one of the things that I share when I go and speak is um just the stories of women in scripture. I'm actually just started to work on my second study, which I'm really excited about. Um, and so it'll have a little bit of a different twist. It's not going to be about women with sexual brokenness, but it'll be about women who who felt unseen by this world, and yet God, you know, was just looking out for them and had his eye on them. And so it's a I'm excited about that one. Um yeah, so yeah, writing, speaking, uh, podcasting, um, and I'm involved in ministry at our church, you know, leading women's ministry, and that's so much fun. I love just being with women in person. Like that's that's the best part.

Israel Caminero: 27:02

So you're writing another book or you're writing another study?

Teresa Whiting: 27:07

Another Bible study, yeah. I call I mean it's it's book form. It's a it's I would call an in-depth Bible study. Like it's not just read this book, but it's you know, lines and worksheets and videos, and uh at the back, I always have like a QR code with a video teaching, and there's a leader's guide, you know, so it's something that people could do, you know, with a group from their church. I think Michelle's going through it right now with a group of women from her church.

Israel Caminero: 27:33

Yes.

Teresa Whiting: 27:34

Isn't that how you found out about me?

Israel Caminero: 27:35

I was just about to say that's how I found out about you. So funny. Our good friend Michelle, she's she's great, um, reached out to me and invited my wife to the study, and I she shared the book, and I looked at it and I was like, hmm. I'm like, I need to invite her on my podcast, and she automatically sent me your information. Like, here you go. And then I reached out to you and you were gracious enough to say yes.

Teresa Whiting: 28:02

Oh, yeah, yeah. I'm excited.

Israel Caminero: 28:04

Yeah, so our good friend Michelle. Shout out to Michelle Maynard. I'm sure she's listening.

Teresa Whiting: 28:10

Yes, yes. Hello, Michelle.

Israel Caminero: 28:14

So that's great. You said you do ministry at your church, also, right? Because your husband's the pastor there.

Teresa Whiting: 28:23

Yes. But I don't sing or play the piano or anything. I don't have those talents or gifts.

Israel Caminero: 28:28

Okay. And you actually bring this book study to the church and do it there in the group setting?

Teresa Whiting: 28:34

Yes. We actually just started going through it. So uh last Tuesday night was our second week. So we're we're new to this church. We've only been here about five months. So um, you know, it's a whole new group of women that I'm getting to get to know and study scripture with. So that's really fun.

Israel Caminero: 28:54

I'm interested to know what's the type of feedback you're getting back from these women. Do they open up to you? And I'm sure they do, as far as what you're talking to them about, or not talking to them about, but what the book entails and stuff they've gone through.

Teresa Whiting: 29:10

Yeah, so I actually am I'm doing the teaching portion and then we're breaking up into small groups for for the discussion time because it's a pretty heavy topic to be in a large group setting. Um, so after the teaching, they they break up into small groups, and like I said, last week was the only the second week. Um, but I've done it with other groups of women, and usually, you know, when you're about halfway through, women start to open up and they start to share their own stories. And um it's powerful, it's very powerful to to see women who I mean in in our last church we did this, and we had women everywhere from their 20s into their 80s. And there were some who had experienced abuse, you know, in their in their childhood and been keeping that secret for 50, 60, 70 years. And it's just really amazing that they're they're willing finally to talk about it, and it's kind of like a relief to them to be able to share their story in a safe place where they know that they're not gonna be silenced or shamed for for sharing their stories. And it's hard. It's hard to hear some of the things, some of the responses that they've gotten because they have been silenced or shamed in the past. But I I feel like the church is getting better, like it's getting a lot better at listening to people's hard stories. It's getting better at the fact that we we really can't afford to be pretending that everything is good all the time and life is just fine because if it was, why did Jesus need to come? So it's been it's been really good to go through the study with women and um and just kind of hear their stories and see them move to places of freedom.

Israel Caminero: 31:05

That's right. That's why I asked, because I remember you saying you, you know, having shame, and I could only imagine, like you said, you've had people that have been keeping that secret for years, and you see it take something like this for them to finally open up and talk about it. I'm not there, I'm not a female, but I want to thank you for what you're doing. I know because I know that a lot of females go through this brokenness that you're talking about. Earlier, you also said that you're an empty nester now and you had kids. Can you explain a little bit about what happened there with these kids? Because you said you had what seven, if I'm not mistaken?

Teresa Whiting: 31:42

No, no, five.

Israel Caminero: 31:43

Five. Okay, sorry for throwing that number out there.

Teresa Whiting: 31:47

Yeah, so uh my husband and I got married and we were diagnosed with um unexplained infertility. We had been trying for about a year to get pregnant, we just assumed, you know, oh, we'll get pregnant right away, because all of my sisters and my mom were very fertile. And so we just thought that would happen and it didn't. And so we started getting checked out, and um, they said we had unexplained infertility, and so we just felt like God was directing us to adopt. Um, we didn't want to go through a lot of the the procedures that we could have. Um, so we just felt like maybe this is how God's gonna grow our family. So we had actually just moved at the time we were in Connecticut, we had moved to Florida, and our Greg was a youth pastor at the time, and our lead pastor said, Hey, I know this organization in New Hampshire, and they kind of cater to people in ministry. It's such a crazy story because we um still to this day never even met the people at that agency. Greg called them and said, Hey, we're we're looking to adopt. Now, when we had looked into adoption, we're like, there's no way we we cannot afford to adopt a child. At the time, it was like $20,000. He was a youth pastor, we had no money, and we were just like, Oh, this isn't this isn't possible. And then he called this agency and they called us back like two weeks later, and they said, We have these twins that need a home, and we think you're the ones. And we were like, What? We hadn't filled out an application, we hadn't sent them one penny. I to this day have never even talked to the people at the agency, but what had happened was there was a family in New Jersey that had gone to Romania and brought back a set of twins, but they had four kids, um, I think six and under, and um, it wasn't working. And so they felt like God brought these kids back to America for another family. And they had called the agency and said, We we'd love to put them in a pastor's family. And they immediately thought of us and called us. And I mean, they were in New Jersey, right by where my parents lived, right by the house I grew up. I was able to fly up, like I don't remember if it was a week or two weeks later. I flew up to New Jersey. I met them. Um, I was able to stay with them until we brought them back to Florida because we had to do a home study. We had to fill out an application and do all the things. Um kind of backwards, but it was it was truly like miraculous. You don't hear stories of, you know, we wanted to adopt. And then literally two months later, we had these twins in our home. It was crazy.

Israel Caminero: 34:36

Um that was totally good.

Teresa Whiting: 34:38

So yeah, yeah, it was so clear. It was so clear, like God was like, Here, these children are for you, and he dropped them in our laps. And then, um, yeah, so we had Isabella and Alex, and then um about a year and a half later, I got pregnant with my daughter Brie. And I don't typically tell this part of the story, but I I think it's interesting. We had been um doing some alternative things, and one of the things we did was we went to an aerodologist and they they look in your eye and they okay, so it's kind of like reflexology with your feet, but it's in your eye. So, like basically, I think, I think the way it goes is that the nerve endings in your body are connected to your iris, and so they can look at your eye and be like, oh, this part of your body needs help. This part of your body needs help. So we went to this iridologist and he was like, Yeah, um here's what I want you to do. And he put us on this really strict diet and was like, no red meats, no white flour, white sugar, all organic food for, you know, and all these herbs. And he said, You'll know in three to four months if this is gonna work for you. And in three and a half months, I was pregnant, and I always say, you know, God is the one who opened my womb, and that was him, and maybe he used that process, and I don't ever want to give people a false hope, like, oh, you just need to go to an uridologist.

Israel Caminero: 36:07

Right.

Teresa Whiting: 36:07

I don't know. All I know is that God opened my womb and I got pregnant with my daughter Brie. And then when she was eight months old, I got pregnant with Caleb and Gabrielle, and we we have no twins in our family that we know of, so that in itself was crazy. Um, so yeah, we went from zero to five in three and a half years, and it was insanity.

Israel Caminero: 36:33

I can only imagine three years, five kids just out of, you know, wow. But you kept it together, and they're adults now.

Teresa Whiting: 36:42

Barely, barely.

Israel Caminero: 36:45

Oh, you kept it together, I'm sure you did. You probably did a wonderful job. You just sitting here saying you didn't, but I'm sure you did. That's so great. I mean, I have three. Yeah, I have three, and you know, it's hard. I could only imagine five. I love your story, Teresa. I love how you overcame your childhood trauma to where you're at now, helping other women with their trauma and where you're at now as far as your ministry and everything goes. How are the Whiting's doing today? You know, I know you said already there's an empty nest and your husband's a pastor and you do things at the church or whatever, but other than that, how are you guys doing today?

Teresa Whiting: 37:30

Yeah, I mean, I think we're doing we are doing as well as you can be in a fallen world. You know, I never like to paint the picture of like everything's great, but um, I'm thankful. I feel like we're really blessed. Uh, we're in this new ministry, and what a gift that God put us in St. Pete um or in St. Petersburg, Florida. And so my favorite place in the whole wide world is the beach, and just the gift that God gave us to put us here in a church where we're at the beach. Um, and it's a really awesome church because it's it's so different than any church we've ever been at. Um, it's very diverse, it's kind of more of a city church, so there's a lot, a lot of brokenness. Um, and the people are just kind of real and raw, and I love that about our church. Um, so you know, Greg and I are learning a new normal of being empty nesters and kind of going into ministry together alone. Because so for the past 30 years, so we just celebrated 30 years in June.

Israel Caminero: 38:40

Congratulations.

Teresa Whiting: 38:42

Thanks. Thanks. We um, you know, the past several ministries, we've gone as a family, it's been a family thing, and I was thinking like, this is the first church, aside from our very first church before we had any kids, like this is the first church we're going to where we don't have any kids, and it's a very different kind of ministry. Like when you have kids, they're they're like the connection point with people, and we don't have that now. Um, so we're learning new ways, you know, different ways. Uh we love to play pickleball. Greg is an avid pickleball player, and so you know, we we were out this morning playing pickleball, meeting people in the community.

Israel Caminero: 39:24

That seems to be the new trend.

Teresa Whiting: 39:26

Yeah, yeah. And down here in Florida, it's a very popular you you can play year-round. It's awesome. So, you know, we do that together. Uh, we try to go to the sunset on the beach most nights um and connect there. Um, so that's been has been really nice for us. Um, and we have you know, we've got great family and great friends and people in our life that that we can be really honest with. So that's that's a gift too.

Israel Caminero: 39:58

Amen. Amen. I would love to see that church. You say it's on the beach, huh?

Teresa Whiting: 40:04

Well, the church is not on the beach, but well, okay, so we are in temporary housing. The church has a ministry house that they are currently renovating that we're going to live in. But in the meanwhile, they have graciously put us up in a condo at the beach. So we are we are like literally at the beach right now for the next uh I think for the rest of this month, and then we're going to be moving. But still, even when we go, the we'll be at a house on the church campus, but it's maybe 15 minutes from the water. So it's still it's I would still say I live at the beach, like even if we're living in that house.

Israel Caminero: 40:45

Yeah, sorry for the misunderstanding. I thought you meant the church was actually on the beach.

Teresa Whiting: 40:49

That's what I'm pretty close.

Israel Caminero: 40:51

Okay. Well, throughout this talk, I've noticed that you shared some scripture quite a few times, but I've come to the point in the podcast where I always ask my guests, I always say when you're having a bad day, but we don't have those anymore, right? No, that's not true. We still have bad days. Just your favorite Bible verse or a Bible verse that's stuck with you throughout the years that you always go back to. Do you have one of those? And what is it and what does it mean to you?

Teresa Whiting: 41:26

So I would say my favorite verse is Psalm 73, 25. It says, My heart and my flesh may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever. Um and I I just think that that's one I've gone back to over and over throughout the years. The the fact that, you know, my heart, my emotions, my flesh, my body, my world could could crumble, it could fail, but God won't. He is the strength of my heart and my portion forever. And I, you know, like when I think about salvation, it's not it's not really just like, oh, I get to go to heaven. It's like I get to have a relationship with the God of the universe. Like He knows me and I know Him. And that's that's my strength, that's my portion now and forever. It's just I I love that that verse. That'd be my favorite, probably.

Israel Caminero: 42:29

That's good too, because even as a Christian, sometimes your f flesh still tries to fail you most of the time, but with God there, you know, He never will let you fail. So I like that. I like that. But now I've come to my Back to the Pass section in the podcast. And if you're not familiar with my Back in the Pass section, is where I asked my guests if the Teresa of today can go back in time and talk to the old Teresa, what would she say? Not saying Teresa would listen back then, but what would you share with her that you know now?

Teresa Whiting: 43:10

I think what I would tell my younger self is can I tell myself two things?

Israel Caminero: 43:18

Yeah, yeah, definitely.

Teresa Whiting: 43:20

Okay, okay. The first thing I would tell myself is that um you don't know what people's stories are. I I was I was a little bit of a bully when I was a kid, and then I became a Christian and I was a little bit of a Pharisee to where I just I I went from being you know unkind and mean to people to just being judgmental. And I have come to realize like you don't know people's stories. So um one of the things I've been trying to do is to ask myself why before what? Like instead of looking at somebody and being like, well, what is their problem or what are they doing is to ask why. Like, what what does that person walk through that's make made them make choices like this? Like, why are they the way they are? And just trying to be a little bit more compassionate on people and understanding. And I would I would just tell myself, like, you don't know what that person has been through. So so stop being so mean. That's what I would tell myself. Um, and then the other thing I think I would tell myself to share my story sooner. Like, don't hold that secret in. Find somebody safe. And if somebody tells you to be quiet or somebody tries to shame you, find somebody else. Like, find a safe person who can handle your story and and get it out and start the healing sooner rather than later.

Israel Caminero: 44:50

That's right. That's right. For anyone that's out there listening, that's some good advice if you're experiencing the things that she was talking about. For any of you listening that might be going through it, don't hold it in. The faster you speak about it, the faster it'll stop and the healing begins. And don't take it from me, take it from her, because she's the coach, I'm not. Her website is Teresa Whiting.com. And like she mentioned, she also has a podcast named Find Hope Here, and you could probably find those on every platform, correct?

Teresa Whiting: 45:33

Yeah, yeah.

Israel Caminero: 45:34

And she also has a book, like she mentioned, called Grace, but it's actually Disgraced with the Discs crossed out, and it's how God Redeems and Restores the Broken. And I'll have links to all those in the podcast description if you guys ever want to reach out to her, listen to her podcast, read her book, or even do the study. And is there anything that you would like to say before we close, Teresa?

Teresa Whiting: 46:01

Um, no, I'm just really thankful for the opportunity to to talk with you and and uh thanks for having me on.

Israel Caminero: 46:09

All right. And I always ask my guests to lead us out in prayer. Do you mind doing that?

Teresa Whiting: 46:16

I don't mind at all. God, um, I want to thank you so much that you are a rescuer, Lord. You come and you pursue us and you take us out of the pit that we are in, whether somebody throws us in there or we put ourselves in there. I just thank you so much for your grace, your kindness, your mercy, your steadfast love that chases us down. And um thank you for this ministry. I thank you for Israel and the work he's doing. I pray that this episode would be a blessing to anyone who listens, that they would find hope in who you are. And Lord, if they don't know you, I ask that they would um be curious, that they would reach out to Israel or me and say, What are you even talking about? Like, Lord, I just ask that anybody um who is listening, Lord, that they will come to know you personally and walk with you and know the joy of having a relationship with the God of the universe. And I just thank you so much for your grace in our lives in Jesus' name, amen.

Israel Caminero: 47:22

Amen. Amen. Thank you for that, and thank you for taking the time to be here and share your story with everyone. And we don't know who's listening. If someone's listening, like I said earlier, that's going through the same thing, take her advice on what to do and speak on it. Don't hold it in. I'd also like to thank all the listeners that have given me support throughout this time and just say thank you to them. Those that I don't know, those that I do know. I appreciate all the love that you're sharing. And I always say this, and I'll say it again, that it's Teresa's story, but it's only to glorify what God did in her life. So that's what I'm here for is to glorify what He does in people's life and how he changes them from who they used to be to who they are now. And on that note, I'd like to say thank you for listening. Until next time, may you be blessed.